Wanna pet the ferret?

A couple of years ago I was in Seattle with my husband and best friend. We decided to be tourists and go check out Pike Place Market. It's such a cool place to explore. We found a place to park the car a couple blocks away and started walking. We had to wait for the light to change to cross the street. Now here is a little quirk about me....I attract strangers. I think it might be because I make eye contact, or I give off a friendly aura, who knows. So of course I make eye contact with a man. He was cupping a knitted cap in his hands. Nestled inside the cap was a white ferret. "Wanna pet the ferret, it's soft as a kitten" he says to me. "Um...no thanks". He was wearing a handmade pretend I.D. tag around his neck claiming he was from some "Save the animals" group. He begged us for some money, we said no and Thank you Jesus the light changed. We went on our way. Well our little group had a lovely time checking out all the funky vendors and kooky little shops. We had lunch at the Athenean Cafe. (The one from Sleepless in Seattle). A guy dressed in a pirate costume came and asked us if we had found his lost cell phone. It was quite an interesting afternoon. We then decided to go down to the waterfront. You have to wind your way down and take a weird creepy elevator, but eventually we made it down there. We walked along and were enjoying the view. My husband spotted an ice cream shop and decided he was in need of a refreshment. My friend and I were just enjoying the view. And guess who I make eye contact with? You guessed it. Ferret Man. He comes up to me and says "You wanna pet the ferret, it's soft as a kitten". "Um ..no thanks". Hey... did that seem like a deja vu? But.... now he adds that this ferret really needs our donations, because he had rescued it from a crack house. That's right, the ferret had grown up in a crack house and was addicted to crack. Not only that, it was now mentally retarded, due to the damage from the drugs. Luckily some children happened along and were totally thrilled to pet the "soft as a kitten, crack addicted, retarded ferret". We quickly made our escape. A couple of months later my son and I came up with a rap song about the incident.

With this ferret you'll be smitten

Cuz he's soft as a kitten.

Stay away from his mouth or you might get bitten.

Cuz this ferret's on crack,

and he might attack.

This ferret is awesome, but you better watch your back.

So won't you start,

opening your heart.

This ferret needs your money, cuz he's mentally retarded.